It all started with a craving. No, not a craving for adventure, tho that is what it turned out to be... it was a craving for Mexican food. My cousin Zach and I have had this craving all week long, tho neither one of us could tame it. Zach is a trucker and constantly on the road, and I ... have no money what-so-ever. I had 2 beef tacos, rice and beans, and more soapapillas then I have ever seen in my life! This part may not seem that important right now, but trust me... it will come back up later.
After our Dine and dash (kidding... we paid!), we decided to go to the mall to christmas shop. Well, ok, I went with to help him find gifts. Anyway, among some things, he bought an Air-zooka (in case you can't figure it out, this is an air bazooka). We stayed at the mall for a while longer, as I was still laughing about this Lady Gaga sex doll and Zach was trying to figure out how to aim his new air cannon, until he decided to go to the bar.
Ah, yes... backyard Beach Bar. friendly faces, dart boards, and the occasional naked old man... luckily he wasn't there that night, I just felt like putting him in the story. I'm not a real big drinker, so I just had some shots: one "backyard fuck", 2 "Jaeger bombs" (my drink of choice), and one "Lemon drop" (a close second). I also had some Tru: Blood (aka, really expensive orange soda in a cool bottle), and a Dr. Pepper, but I'll get back to the Pepper in a little bit. That night, I learned something pretty cool about myself... I'm pretty decent at darts! However, I have to throw them "blue rajah" style (for those of you who have seen Mystery Men), and I have to have a bit of a buzz goin. It was my first night playing darts, and I actually ended up teaching a couple people how to play! Anyway, it was 3 in the morning, last call, and I decided to order my Dr. Pepper. Our waitress/ hostess/ thingy (a good friend of Zach's) kept forgetting my damn soda, so I spend 10 minutes following her, making sure I got my drink.
Then we left... 3 AM seems like a good idea to go home after a night of drinking, right? well, I guess not! It turns out that Zach met this one personal trainer chick who, and I still have no idea how she pulled this off, managed to take us to the gym and forced us to work out. Now, those of you who know me know that I pretty much refuse to drink water unless its a life or death situation... Well, it kinda was, that night. I felt my throat, not only dry up, but start to close, as well (any doctor can tell you, this is not good). Thus I began to drink water. Now, I thought I was done with the work out, but then I somehow found myself on a stair master for 20 minutes. I got off and had an encore presentation of my mexican food and booze. (I still say that piece of taco shell looked like a llama). Then we all proceeded to go get a bite to eat... and what do you think of when you think food after a workout? that's right, kids! We went to Denny's.
Now its 3 days later, and I am still in pain...
Robert "I can't believe I ate the whole thing" Laff
What the fuck, Rob?
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